Wings for Life - Ft Lauderdale, May 3, 2015

Wings for Life World Run is a fantastic global race event that I had been hearing about since early 2014. This race is different than most races because it happens at the exact same time at multiple places around the world. All runners line up at their respective start lines, the gun goes off, and runners begin racing the course. Not only are they racing themselves and the other competitors at their individual locations, but the runners in various cities are also racing against one another for a global champion. 30 minutes after the last starter crosses the finish line, the pace car starts to follow the pack. When the pace car passes the runner, they are officially out of the race.

100% of the entry fee goes toward spinal cord research, and who doesn't love charitable giving like that? Sign me up!

On race morning, there was a much larger turnout than I had anticipated. It was already late in the season, so I figured many people would rather not deal with the heat and humidity... but I was wrong.There were SO MANY PEOPLE there!

Right away though, I knew my heart wasn't really in it. I was struggling to get going right out of the gate, and I knew this would be one of those days where I would need at least 2-3 miles of running just to warm up and shake out the normal aches and pains that I struggle with when running. Being a slowpoke, I knew that the likelihood that I would even have that opportunity before being pulled by the catcher car was slim to none. And from there, I was discouraged right off the bat, and couldn't seem to get out of my own way.

So I adopted the attitude that my friend Mel has tried to instill me. Each time I was within 5 feet of the person in front of me, my goal was just to slowly but surely pull up to them and overtake them. focusing on just getting in front of the next person (over and over again) helps to distract me from the larger picture that gets me discouraged in the first place. I don't know if I'm even explaining that right.

Anyway, I'm horrible at math, but they provided us with a little calculator online to tell us approximately how far we would be able to travel before we were officially out of the race. Being a slowpoke, I really didn't anticipate being able to go much more than 2 miles or so before the catcher car caught up with me and ended my race. I was surprised when I hit 2 miles.

Then I hit 3 miles, and I was equally surprised. I had finally shaken off the morning aches and pains. I was settling into my rhythm, and while I knew that the catcher car was right behind me, I forced myself to go one step at a time and overtake the next person. Then the next. I was picking up speed. I was feeling good. My lungs were feeling excellent. I was a beautiful day to be out for a run, it was a beautiful day to be alive!

Around 3.5 miles I started to hear a commotion in the not so far distance behind me. I peeked over my shoulder and saw people behind picking up their pace, sprinting toward me. I knew the catcher car was on its was toward me. I still had a lot of energy in the tank, and I kicked it into overdrive.

Officially I made it 3.62 miles in 51.39. My pace was 14:15. I still had energy leftover, and I am certain that had I been afforded another few minutes out there on the course, I would have pulled an even faster pace.

This race was fantastic. I can't emphasize this enough. I was really satisfied with the support (although the logistics of catching the bus back to the start line area and the afterparty left a lot to be desired). I was so satisfied that while I was at the afterparty, I signed up for next year. And next year, on May 8, 2016, I am sure that I will make it farther.

For more information about this event, please visit their website here.

Coral Springs Half Marathon - March 28, 2015

We can just call this one the one where I got hit by a car, and we can call it a day!

OK, so maybe its not that simple, but I did get hit by a car during this race.

Let me start by saying that this was the 3rd time I had run this half marathon. I ran it the first year with a friend, I ran it the second time solo with an attempt to PR, so when I registered for the race I knew that I would achieve that illusive PR on the third time. After all, third time's a charm, right?

And I probably would have reached that goal had I not gotten hit by a car, seriously. Or maybe it wasn't the actual getting hit by a car that slowed me down, so much as the fallout and the reporting that was required and almost getting pulled from the course a number of times after the incident. But I'm getting ahead of myself here. Maybe I should start at the beginning...

After the Gasparilla Challenge in late February, I had a few weeks off from running races. Husbeast and I took a small vacation, we had some quality quiet time on the weekend (something that we never get during running season because I am always off in one place or another), and we just enjoyed being together. I took a break from long distances, and focused on shorter distance runs, but more often... afterall, I had decided that I would be running my first Ultra Marathon with my friend Mel the week after the coral springs race. Essentially that meant that the Coral Springs half marathon was my last long training run before my 50K the following week, so although initially when I registered for this race, I had wanted to PR, I knew that if I was being honest, that just wasn't in the cards.

The morning of the race was a series of disasters. I was late waking up... possibly because I just wasn't feeling it. I was slow driving to the start. I slogged through getting prepared in my car before leaving the parking lot. I was one of the last people to the start corral, and as the National Anthem started to play, I realized that I had to go to the bathroom. I almost missed the start of the race because of that trip to the port-o-john. This was definitely not how I like to start a race. I was frazzled. And because I was frazzled, I started at a much slower pace than I normally do. I was hovering at just over 16 minutes per mile at a run-walk-run... and my body really just wanted to walk and skip over the whole running thing.

But after about a mile and a half, my body limbered up a little bit. I started itching to increase my speed. I think this is the first time I started putting 2 and 2 together that if I started almost unreasonably slow pace-wise I could increase my speed significantly and make up time as the race went on. I almost didn't believe my eyes when I saw it happen the week before at Gasparilla with Mel... but this race was feeling like a repeat. My pace was increasing without much work on my part, my energy levels were up, I felt strong and capable. And soon, by mile 5 I realized that I was running at a faster pace than I had ever run before, and I wasn't even feeling slightly fatigued!

I like this course because although it is not entirely closed, the runners run a large loop and are given at least 1 full lane of traffic along the course. On top of that, the cones protecting the runners from the traffic are closely spaced, there is a really strong police presence, and the support is spectacular. This is by far one of my favorite races because the support is so great, obviously I must love it to repeat it 3 years in a row, right? But there is a spot on the course where there is not a lot of support, and the officers are a bit more spaced out. This is somewhere between mile 7-9. Instead of being in a more suburban commercial area, the course sprawls out through a residential area flanked on both sides by gated community after gated community. And this was where I ran into problems with traffic.

Despite there being plenty of advertisement and signage out there that there was a race happening that weekend, it must have been the national convention of stupid drivers out there. Four different times I was running in my designated race course lane when a driver disregarded the traffic pattern and broke into the runner lane nearly hitting me. It was the 5th car... that was so oblivious to the world around her cell phone that ultimately hit me.

Don't get me wrong. I am acutely aware of just how lucky I was that morning. I was lucky because I felt a brief warm breeze coming off the engine of her car as she pulled up behind me. I turned to check my surroundings over my left shoulder as I was lifting my weight off my left foot. Had my weight been disbursed more evenly, or had I been at a different place in my stride, the damage could have been devastating. But I was lucky. Her bumper hit the back of my left knee as it was mid-bend. I tripped a little and fell forward and out of the way. I was lucky to have seen her.

And although she broke into a restricted lane, she raised her arms up and screamed at me as if I was in the wrong. I regained my footing and kept plugging along as she decided whether she would stop to get out of the car and inspect either the car or me for damage... She chose poorly, ultimately deciding on neither. Instead, she drove less than a foot behind me, laying on her horn, screaming obscenities at me. I wish I could be tough and say that for her sake I was happy that there was a police officer less than 2 tenths of a mile away who came running to my rescue and who then stopped her, but I'm a baby. And I was shocked. After the officer determined that I was OK, I continued on my way.

The shock came for me around mile 8 when I realized that I was still on track for a PR, and I was still running my best race ever. I was running on adrenaline at that point, I am sure... but still...

At the water stop at mile 8.5, I briefly told the person in charge that I had been hit and that I was OK, but that they needed to be aware that it happened. And after that it was a blur. Every mile or so, I either had a police officer, a race official, a volunteer, or the SAG wagon try to talk to me to get more information. I understand that they had a job to do, and I don't begrudge them that, but I had 4 miles left and I didn't want to lose my PR now because of administrative issues if getting hit by a car wasn't what actually slowed me down. I continued on my way, but after getting stopped for the 4th time with an attempt to pull me from the course, I was angry. No amount of running was going to alleviate my anger. I told the officials that I would meet them at the finish line to go over any reports that needed going over, but to please leave me.

And so I finished. I lost out on the PR because I had been stopped so many times after the accident... but I finished the race. I would have intense pain in my shoulder and upper back for the rest of the week, but I finished the race. Under those circumstances, that's all I could have asked for. I was lucky. It might take some time for me to trust drivers on semi-closed courses again...  but with time, all things are possible.

Half Marathon #37
Gun 3:21:57
Chip 3:21:02
OA 381/386
Gen 217/222
AG 29/30

Gasparilla Amber Challenge - February 21- 22, 2015

Since I started running half marathons just over 2 years ago, I had heard wonderful things about the Tampa Bay Gasparilla Distance Classic. Over the course of 2 days, participants run a 15K, a 5K, a half marathon, or an 8K. Participants can run any any of the races individually, or they can run any combination of the races to qualify for one of the various challenges. It was my goal to be able to run the combination of all 4 races, but in order to do so, the half marathon had to be finished well under the 3:30 time that I like to allow myself for a buffer, and I was not sure that I would be able to make that cut off after running the equivalent of 12.4 miles the day before.

Instead, I had to settle for the Gasparilla Amber Challenge: a 15k followed by a 5k on day 1, and the half marathon on day 2. I was splitting the costs of the trip with my friend Lisa (who had done A1a with me the week prior), but in the week since I had last seen her, she found out that the prognosis on her knee was not so good, and she was going to have to sit the weekend out. In the end, that was probably the best option for her anyway because she wound up with some serious allergy symptoms going on and was s-i-c-k.

A very cold start to the 15K

This is one of the largest races in the Tampa Bay area, and the expo was fantastic. The swag bags for the participants was stellar, and for those of us who were just crazy enough to do one of the challenges, we were even given jackets! We almost needed them the morning of the first set of races, if only it wasn't bad juju to wear race apparel before completing the race.

The morning of day 1 was colder than normal, but we had been going through an uncharacteristic cold snap recently. I was on my own at the race, but I knew that I would be amongst friends as I had seen facebook's chattering nonstop about this race for the previous 2 weeks. At the start line area, I met up with my friend Mel from Jacksonville, and his friend Suzy. We also met up with some other friends including April. I didn't think that I would be able to keep pace with them in the cold weather, but Mel (as encouraging as he is) insisted that he was going to be pacing the group relatively slowly so that we would have energy on day 2.

After the 15K

We started off at what Mel would call a "slow pace" but for me it was still a little faster than I would have liked to start. We chatted, our group dwindled down to just me, Mel and Suzy. We distracted ourselves, we encouraged one another, we took it easy, and then we harped on Mel that his definition of slow was clearly not the same as the definition that can be found in the dictionary. 

At the end of the race, I was exhausted. The cold had given way to a bright sunny day, the raw chill associated with the fog had burned off, and the temperatures were increasing, but once we stopped moving we all felt a little chilled. We crossed the finishline together, then we went to Mel's car to meet up with his wife and hopefully warm up for a few minutes before the 5K.

Before the 5K

The 5K was one of the first 5K races that Mel's wife Jolyn would participate in (at least that she would be able to get a medal for). I had never met Jolyn before, but I immediately fell in love with her. When we started the 5K, Jolyn paced with Suzy and another of our friends (Amanda), while Mel and I stayed back to allow her some space without the stress of her husband. 

The 5K was much more walker friendly, and we used this to our advantage. We laughed, we joked, we encouraged Jolyn, and when Mel and I saw the RedBull Girls giving out free cans of Redbull, we quickly detoured off the course to procure enough for our little band of athletes. Our finish time was respectable for a walk pace, not one of my worst, but not one of my best. But we helped Jolyn into her 5K finish and she finished close to her fastest pace up until that point.

After the 5k

At the finishline, my friend Lisa met up with us and we went to lunch to recover. Then we rested up for day 2.

The morning of Day 2 was exponentially warmer than day 1 had been. Instead of long sleeves, I probably could have worn a tank, but because of a packing fail on my part, I had really only planned for the uncharacteristically cool weather. I met up with Amanda in my hotel lobby and we walked to the start together where we met up with Mel and Suzy. 

What I haven't mentioned about my friend Mel is that he is a Galloway trainer and pacer, he has paced many races, including the RunDisney races. Most of the time he runs as a group pacer, but sometimes people reach out to him privately to pace him for specific events. I have seen Mel at various events, I was friends with him on facebook, but I during the course of this weekend, it was clear to me why people like to have him pace them.

I rarely get pictures of me running!

When we started the race, a couple of us were concerned that we couldn't maintain the required pace through the first 5 miles of the course (where the pace requirement relaxed a little). So we took it really slow, but maintained a strong pace around 15:45 per mile. After the first 5 miles, we slowed a little to around 16 minutes per mile and Mel and I got to talking. 

I like to run negative splits, and I started joking with Mel that with a little extra effort, I could bring my overall pace from 16 minutes down to around 14:30 (finishing the half marathon), and bring in a PR. I was joking, and Mel knew it, but at the same time, he saw the opportunity for a challenge. We discussed the possibility of forcing myself to PR with Amanda and Suzy, and they suggested that we leave them and pursue this option.

And we agreed that if it was a possibility, Mel could help me reach my goal. So we said our goodbyes, and Mel and I slowly started to create a gap between us and them. With his steady coaching, we started overcoming runners in front of us. We weren't sprinting, but on our run intervals we were pushing just a tad harder than normal with the intent to pass this next person or that next person. I looked down at my watch, and by mile 9, we were well on our way to getting me that PR.

Gasparilla is a spectacular spread, with all the bells and whistles, but the one thing that nobody ever really talks about is the course. The 15K from day 1 is straight our and back (flanked on one side by the gorgeous waterway). But then the 5K repeats the first portion of the course and goes out and back. The half marathon starts with 4-5 miles on a small island, but then the last 10 mile are the exact same course as the 15K. This leads to boredom and for me, boredom leads to burnout. and by mile 9 on the half course, I was really feeling the burnout.

After finishing the half

Mel kept pushing me, I kept following. The temperatures kept increasing. And my asthma kept worsening. With less than 1 mile to do, my body failed me. I couldn't seem to catch my breath, the coughing from running in the cold the day before had caught up to me, and it was so bad I felt waves of nausea. I begged Mel to leave me behind. There was only so much that he could do to help me get to a PR, but my body wouldn't allow me to go any further.

1 mile left, and he left me to my own devices. I slowed to a walk, the coughing continued, then the nausea turned to vomiting. I stopped to vomit with half a mile left, then I vomited again with only yards to go. I was spent. I didn't reach the PR, but I was only about 5 minutes off from it. Not bad for such a strain on my body, and for day 2 of a challenge like this.

And when I crossed the finishline, Mel was right there waiting for me with a smile on my face, asking when we would be planning our next adventure.*

With an armload of bling after the weekend!

15K

Chip 2:19:33

Gun 2:23:21

Div 430

Gen 2835

OA 5033

5K

Chip 57:33

Gun 59:11

Div 801

Gen 6177

OA 10706

Half

Chip 3:24:38

Gun 3:33:11

Div 474

Gen 3146

OA 5533

*When we finished the race, Mel suggested that I join him for his next ultra marathon... Ultimately I chose to join him, but at that point, it was only a pipe dream. He's always up for a good challenge. He and I have some other extreme distance trips planned for the near future... but that's a story for another day.

Weston Rotary Run for Tomorrow Half Marathon- December 14, 2014

This is another one of those races that I really don't have a lot to say about... I'm going to try to share a little about this race, but feel free to skim past this mediocrity. The mediocrity doesn't come from the writing (I hope), but instead was palpable throughout the event. I feel horrible saying that, but I can't find any other words to really express my thoughts about this race.

I wasn't really expecting all that much from a race that was put on by a local rotary club. My mother has been a Rotarian for most of my teenage and adult life, and I was a Rotarian for a couple of years when I was finishing my Masters degree and beginning my Ph.D... I loved Rotary for what it provided me in terms of leadership training, community service opportunities, and the more global attitude that it seemed to foster in me. I don't love it for what it provides in a road race though.

It was a last minute decision to register for the Weston Rotary Run for Tomorrow Half Marathon. I wanted to get one more half marathon under my belt before the end of the calendar year, and this seemed to fit into my schedule perfectly. I knew it would be a smaller race, and was excited for that, because I expected that at a Rotary event I would get the kind of course support that I am fond of... you know... the kind that is actually existent... without having to deal with the massive crowds at the other local race that was happening that same day.

My friend Seth chose to run the event with me, but when I say "with me" that doesn't mean stride-for-stride matching. What I actually mean here is that we drive together, hang out at the start line together, we each run our own race, then he meets me at the finishline when I am done.

The field was really small. and normally that wouldn't have bothered me, but I was having a slow start day. The first 3 miles (aka, until the sun came up), my vision was constantly being disturbed by the police cruiser that was following directly behind me because I was the last in the pack. After the sun came up, I managed to pick up a little speed and put some pace between me and the last finisher, but I wasn't able to maintain my status of "not-last for long."

It was a gorgeous day, and although it was a little warmer than I would normally like, I wasn't really worried about the weather. What bothered me though is that the race was hosted in a town that is well-known in South Florida for it's affluence and the amount of money that is spent manicuring the perfect little entries of all of the perfect little gated communities. This means (and I don't know why it didn't occur to me until the middle of the race), that there was no shade to be found, and the views bored me half to death because all I saw over and over again was variations of the exact same landscaping. I was bored out of my mind, and I slowed down because of that.

By mile 8, I soon found that I was back of the pack again... this doesn't bother me normally, but the cruiser who was at the tail end of the pack wouldn't give me the space that I needed, and was right on my heels the entire time. So of course, I was happy when at mile 9, the officer in the cruiser asked if I was ok, then proceeded to leave me out there on the course myself. Guess her shift was over? I don't know.

Like I said, I was happy to have a little more space to do my own thing, but that happiness was short lived. Apparently, when the cruiser passed me, the people at the aid stations determined that the race was already over, so I went without course support for the last 4 miles. No water is ok for some folk, but not back of the packers who have no shade and who are in a concrete jungle in South Florida. I was also left to my own devices to cross major intersections on my own. I had to stop for traffic, and when I say major intersections, think 3 lanes each direction.

As I rounded the corner and came to the finishline area, I knew there was something wrong. I was well within the mandated time frame for finishers, but I could tell that the finishline was basically already packed up. From a distance, I could tell that my friend Seth was having a heated conversation with one of the timing officials. I later learned that he basically had to argue with the officials to prevent them from packing up and leaving me out there on the course entirely. They must have been in a rush? I don't know.

I finished. It wasn't pretty. I did it without the support that I should have had, and the support  that I paid for. It was another race to add to the tally for 2014, but I won't be returning.

Gun 3:31: 55
Net: 3:30:50
Pace 16:05/mile

Run Til You're Boared 50K Ultra Marathon- April 5, 2015

I know that I am still really far behind in blogging about races from this year... 9 races behind to be exact, but I had to jump forward to talk about my most recent race. Look at the title of this post... that's not a typo. It *is* supposed to say 50K... also known as just over 31 miles... also known as absolutely insane! I wanted to blog about it while the memories are still fresh, so here goes...

***

If someone had told me at the beginning of the year that I would be an ultra marathoner, I would have accused them of being into some fairly serious drugs. I've only been running for 4 years, and my first half marathon was in January of 2012. I attempted to train for my first marathon which was scheduled for January 2013, but I gave up after chronic injuries left me in constant pain.

When I backed out of my marathon experience, I realized that I really wasn't all that sad. When I stopped to think about it, I realized that I didn't really want to be a marathoner. Sure, it would have been nice to put in the training and get it done, but I wasn't doing it because I wanted to do it, but rather because it felt like the only logical step after completing countless half marathons already.

I'm a back of the packer.  I have asthma. I'm overweight. I struggle with foot issues. Sure, I wanted to take my running to the next level while overcoming great obstacles, but deep down, I knew that marathoning wasn't for me. Friends would ask me all the time when I planned to take that leap, but after that failed attempt at training for a marathon, the answer was always the same: I just don't want to. Maybe you want to, but I don't.

And then something crazy happened.

I spent the weekend at a race with my dear friend Mel, and he paced me through a 15k, a 5k and a half marathon. And he kept talking about this crazy event he would be doing on Easter Sunday in Jacksonville: a 50K Ultra Trail race calledthe Run Til You're Boared. I thought he was insane, but I wanted to check out the website. He told me repeatedly that this was the perfect race for me to take my running up a notch without the pressure that is normally associated with a full marathon.

But I was so untrained...

By the time my interest was piqued enough to pull the trigger on registration and get airfare to Jacksonville, I only had 5 weeks to train. And training wouldn't be easy. I had never logged over 14 miles at a time, and never logged over 18 miles in a day... somehow I had to get my head around how this was all going to work. I messaged Bobby Green (the race director) a few times to ask about terrain, I talked to a couple of established ultra runners for their advice, and I told a couple of very select friends. I was afraid that if I told everyone before the event, that they would think I was a failure if I didn't cross the finish-line.

On the day of the race, crossing the finish-line seemed like the easiest thing in the world. The real struggle for me was crossing the start-line. From the moment we pulled into the park, I was nauseous and overcome with an intense feeling of dread. 10 seconds before the start of the race I burst into tears and started to hyperventilate. But my friend Mel was right there by my side, as were other veteran ultra runners who turned to me and gave me encouraging smiles and words.

Even after the gun went off and we started our VERY long day of running, the attitude of other runners never changed. People were absolutely exhausted, some were downright miserable in their own socks and shoes, but they were each out there doing their own version of epicness... and they were supportive of each and everyone else on the course.

We were taking liberal bathroom breaks, breaks to change and refuel, and enjoying the opportunity to be in such a gorgeous setting, and this reflected in our time. For the most part, the course was fairly straightforward. 5 loops of 6.2 miles, all relatively flat, mostly in dirt roads through the wildlife preserve. But there were a few tricky areas of the course where we were routed through burn-breaks (where the course significantly narrowed and the footing was through deep loosely packed dirt and sand).

But although the course was tricky at times, the support more than made up for it. There were 3 aid stations on the course, and the race director did an excellent job of anticipating everyone's needs. My stomach was so upset during the race that I had to survive almost entirely off of pepsi (for sugar) and pickle juice (for salt), but there were options for both vegetarians and carnivores alike... with food ranging from gummy bears and marshmallow peeps, to bananas and oranges, to pb&j and bacon. Because the field of runners was so small, the volunteers at the aid station quickly learned what each runner preferred and made certain that it was immediately available to them when they came through. In retrospect, the only thing that I think the aid stations should have had at the very front of their tables was sunscreen... the weather was perfect, but it was overcast... so although I applied sunscreen, it clearly wasn't enough... note to self: next time be more careful.

Anyway, There were a few moments where I worried that I wouldn't be able to finish the race in the prescribed 10 hour time limit, but not once did I allow my mind to go to the negative side of questioning whether a finish was possible or not. Which I think leads me to the most important revelation of the day...

Anything is possible with the right attitude and mindset.

With an eye on the finish, you can do anything you put your mind to... as long as you really put your mind to it, failure is not an option. Barring any unforeseen injuries (which are always possible), your mind gives out long before your body ever will. If you enter a situation with the right attitude, the power of positive thinking will get you far. This is obviously not just a lesson for running, but sometimes it takes a crazy experience like an ultra to bring something like this into perspective.

At the end of the day, I was the last finisher with a time of 9:44:16. Not bad, all things considered. Age awards are 5 deep in ultras, and my time also qualified me as having achieved 4th place in my age division. I still can't believe that I did it! 

My name is Amy, and I'm an ultra runner!

I think the best way to really understand what this event was all about is to watch a video or two. Here are a couple of videos that my friend Mel took while we were out there... if you had to watch just one, I might suggest the last video which shows us coming into the finish line and all the excitement that went into it:

RTYB 50k 3rd loop video
Posted by Mel Abando on Monday, April 6, 2015

RTYB 50K 4th loop video
Posted by Mel Abando on Monday, April 6, 2015

RTYB 50k 5th and last loop video 2 - Finish line
Posted by Mel Abando on Monday, April 6, 2015

Wrapping up 2014, ringing in 2015

Happy 2015! As I sit here thinking about all of my accomplishments of 2014 and planning my goals for 2015, I am reminded about how far behind I am with my blogging and my race recaps from the previous year. If you will allow me, I'd like to skip ahead to my yearly wrap up and goal setti
ng for 2015, then return to finish blogging about the last few months of 2014. It will be a little disjointed, but to me, it seems to make sense.

The number one goal that I had in terms of running this year was to have completed 520 miles. For some more experienced runners, this might have seemed like a really lame goal, but it was just slightly higher than the goal of the year prior, and considering that I spent the last half of 2013 injured, setting this nominal goal for 2014 seemed doable. At the end of the day though, I hadn't counted on being sidelined with foot complications, and this goal was just not attainable.

After calculating and recalculating my tally for the year, I finished having traveled 323.11 miles.

In some respects, I am happy that I was able to do this much, and in other respects, I am saddened that I set a goal and wasn't able to meet it. I hate not finishing what I started, and it feels like I have let myself down. Husbeast keeps telling me to open my eyes and see all that I did manage to accomplish this year instead of what I wasn't able to accomplish... so here goes.

This year, (although I haven't finished blogging about all of them), I completed

• 15 half marathons
• 2 10K races
• 1 6K race
• 2 5K races
• 1 4K race
• 1 race that billed itself as a 5K OCR but came up lacking

and the most important distance race of my life...

• My dissertation was completed and successfully defended, earning me the title of "Doctor."

I also was able to check off another 6 states in my quest for running a half marathon in each state of the United States (KY, TN, MS, AR, LA, UT).

As I think toward next year, I have one goal... and that is to finish what I started last year and reach that number of 520. This year, I will do it.

Halloween Half Marathon, Miami Beach - October 25, 2014

I spent the entire month of September slacking off in the running department. I told myself that it was to help recover from the nasty feet injuries that I had been dealing with for almost the entire past year, but that's not true. I kind of talked myself into thinking that I couldn't find the time to go out for a run with my hectic new schedule of teaching in the evenings, but that's not true either. I could have gotten up in the morning to run if I had really wanted to. I forced myself to go to the gym to try to keep up my cardio, but in the end, I realize that it was more of just going through the motions, rather than pushing myself. The fact, plain and simple is that I was feeling pretty l-a-z-y during the month of September, and I just didn't wanna.

But then, just as I was emerging from my lazy-funk, I suddenly lost my voice. Normally laryngitis wouldn't be a big deal, but it developed into something more. 3 days later, not only did I no longer have a voice, but I was starting to audibly wheeze from somewhere in my throat. Throat wheezing is nowhere near as scary as bronchial wheezing so I dismissed the symptoms as just some fluke allergy issue.

getting ready

But the next day, I developed a cough. A deep dry cough that was as unproductive as congress is frequently proving to be. I sounded like a child with whooping cough, and I couldn't catch my breath. I rushed to the emergency room, where it was discovered (after a few consecutive albuterol nebulizer treatments) that I was in fact having a horrible acute asthma attack. It took me almost a week and a half to recover and feel that I could breath sufficiently without the help of pharmaceuticals.


When this past weekend rolled around, and it was time for the Halloween half marathon in Miami Beach, I knew that I would really have to focus and hold it together just to finish upright, but I also didn't want to take a DNS (did not start) on this race.

with Brina and Seth, my running and travel buds

In some respects, I feel like I really surprised myself, yet in other ways I really felt like I let myself down. For example, I am surprised that I got out there and finished in a decent time considering that I had a fluke respiratory issue in the 2 weeks leading up to the race... and on the other hand, I feel like I let myself down by only being able to run my intervals for the first 6.5 miles and then choosing to walk the rest. In some ways I was surprised that I could make it 6.5 miles doing my intervals in the first place, and then I felt let down that my pace was horrendously slow.

I love having a Garmin to be able to really keep myself in check and ensure that I am staying on pace, but it can be a double edged sword... something that I realized at this race.

My friends Vikki and Richard were completing their first halfs

While its great to keep yourself on track for pace, there is such thing as being too clock and pace obsessed.  I wouldn't say that its a debilitating obsession or anything, but it is definitely something I am concerned about. Whereas earlier in my running half marathons journey I might have been less concerned with the pace if I was having an off day, at the Halloween race, it was clear that not making my interval times (for legitimate reasons like coughing up small children from my injured lungs), was just another reason to get down on myself and start with the negative self-talk.

Gone seem to be the days where I just focused on the running and the journey of it all, rather than the finish.

For this reason, in this post, I wont be including my finish time or my place like I normally would. I'll just say that I finished faster than my first half marathon, but not by much. And that time's not bad considering how under-trained I was... something I am not so proud of.

What I can say about the course is that it was a million times better than the course for the same race as last year. The race started at Jungle Island where the parking was a nightmare. I needed the rest room before the race, and because we had difficulty parking and had to walk to the port-o-lets, we actually arrived back at the start line after the gun had already gone off. The course took us up and over the Macarthur Causeway for approximately 4 miles and into South Miami beach where we ran through South Point Park. From there we traveled approximately 4 miles along Ocean Drive to  Lummus Park and along the boardwalk to a turnaround point where we then looped back to the finish. While It was considerably a better course than last year's with no "hardpacked sand" to run along, we spent the majority of the race running on bricks and concrete. Again, I loved being on the boardwalk but the boards get incredibly slick from the humidity and dew, and I am afraid to fall on my face.

Because most of the race is off of pavement, the jury is still out as to whether I will run this race again next year. But they do have awesome finishers medals, and it is an opportunity to dress up for Halloween and run a race.

What do you think of my lady bug costume?

Half Marathon 28 complete!

Everyone needs a fat friend? Really?

I don't talk about weight much because for me being healthy is less about a number on a scale and more about how strong and active I can be. But I have something to talk about here, and its kind of hard.

I read recently that the best way to develop an active and fit lifestyle is to surround yourself with like-minded people. I most certainly have done that over the past couple of years and I have found a great group of friends who are super supportive of my endeavors and encourage me to always be a better version of myself. Most of my friends are really active, but there is one specific group of girlfriends whom I have been spending a lot of time with lately. We've been enjoying all the wonderful things about South Florida in the summer... the training runs (where lately I just go to support because my body is acting like it is made of glass), the social events, the concerts in the local venues, the laughs, and some serious heart to heart talks.

Almost 2 months ago, I got home from spending time with these friends at run club and saw a message on Facebook from another facebook friend (who is somewhat outside of my immediate circle but who I have had good interaction with in the past and who also seems really supportive). She's undergone a significant weight loss transformation and is now a rep for beach body. I truly believe that her message came from the right place, but was just really misguided. out of the blue, she wrote:

I care about you. I want to know if I can help you to lose weight so that we can get you running in good shape?:)

I tried to be ok with it and let it roll off my back, but I must admit that I was really offended. I've maintained my weight loss since my injury last year. Weight has always been an issue with me, and for most women (myself and my social group included) weight is a private thing. We don't talk about what weight we want to lose, we just talk about getting stronger and being better versions of ourselves. And then we do it.

But getting that message was tough. I called in the cavalry, and they all offered their variations of support and I felt better. But inside of me, I still hurt. Shit, I'm getting teary eyed right now. And I haven't even gotten to why I'm writing yet...

The thing is, I know that I'm overweight. I don't need someone to tell me that. I don't talk about my weight much because I have struggled with extended periods of disordered eating, and I don't want to accidentally contribute to a worstening of my own issues, or trigger someone else's issues. In that end, just know that I don't need to be told that I'm overweight out of the blue. Even if you love me, my weight, and what I am doing or not doing to maintain it is not anyone's business but my own.

And I am confident that it is a private affair because my medical workups are fine, indicating that my risk factors have all gone down since I started running 2.5 years ago. The doctor actually says that if I lose weight, that would only benefit me in terms of vanity's sake, medically weight-loss isn't going to affect me much physically and medically.

But the thing is, like many other people, I have a vain streak. I want to be attractive. And so much of our culture says that to be slender is attractive. I don't mean like Renee Zellweger at her normal weight although many people strive for that. Instead, I would love to have a body with weight on it that more resembles that of Renee Zellweger at her +30lbs Bridget Jones weight (ideal on left below, what women seem to strive for on right):

That doesn't mean to say that I think either version of Renee Zellweger is not attractive or less valuable. There is definitely no skinny shaming going on in this post, instead, for my own frame, I would probably prefer the pic on the left.

Again, my vain streak, and my own personal journey with weightloss is very private and personal to me. I wouldn't share it here, and I don't bring it up with my friends ever. They never want to hear me say anything disbarraging about my body. But recently I say this picture from a recent concert where we saw John Legend play: 

 

And its a great picture, right? I absolutely love this picture of the 6 of us. Except, when I saw the picture, I wasn't thinking that. Instead, the voice of the girl who left me the facebook message was in my head, saying loud and clear:

Well every group of girls needs a fat friend.

I do not talk like that. And I don't make negative comments about my body that way. And I really try to respect my friends and not use the term "fat" ever about myself, but that voice got to me. To clarify, my friend who left the facebook message did NOT say that I'm the fat friend, but this was my internalization of what she said. And it really got to me. And then I realize that the problem is that I am comparing myself to other people, not to myself.

Of course when I am comparing myself to the bodies of these amazing women, I will feel overweight, but they are also much slighter than me in terms of bone structure in the first place. I cannot compare myself to other people, and the only thing that I have to compare myself to IS myself. I'm on this journey for myself, and I recognize that I have my own issues to contend with.

I'm taking this process slowly so that I don't trigger any underlying residuals from my disordered eating in my teens and early 20s. But I'd like to start seeing downward movement. Not because other people want that for me, but because I want that for me.

I read somewhere recently that sometimes people are motivated by the thought of competition, and that if people put their money where their mouths are, they are more likely to reach the goals they set. So I joined Diet Bet. Basically you place a wager (usually between $20-35) to join a specific bet (either a 6 month bet for 10% loss, or a 1 month bet for a 4% loss), and you check in before, occasionally during, and after. If you meet your goal, you get a cut of the pot. I found a challenge that was run by Alex Respess from season 1 of Extreme Makeover Weightloss edition.

I think it should be great motivation to work with him. There are 161 people in the challenge and the entry is $30 for August 11- Sept 07 with a goal of losing 4% of your total body weight in the 28 day period. The pot is already up to $4,830.00. I think it will give me some accountability as I start to get the scale moving again. 

To join this diet bet, follow this link. I would love to have you all join me.

What? Another state?

OK. So here's the thing. I've accepted that I'm injured. And we all know that I'm a little stubborn. I was told to be in the boot for 2 weeks before my follow up, and I admit, I was only half in compliance.

I work a couple of part time jobs, but for the most part not only do I work them from home, but I also have the full time job of finishing my doctoral dissertation (also from home). And I couldn't justify waking up, putting the boot on to walk 10 feet to my office and sitting for a couple of hours, then walking the distance to the fridge and back, then sitting for some more hours... etc. Because short distances didn't hurt. But the evening would eventually roll around and my foot would hurt again. And stupid me, I was unwilling to accept that it wasn't getting better because when I was at home in my house I was not entirely in compliance.

I went for the followup, and he joked that after hearing that, he couldn't understand why I wasn't getting better either. So he ordered another 2 weeks in the boot. I felt like I was getting better until Saturday when I went to a concert and some drunk girl both tripped over my foot, then kicked it out of the way when she couldn't figure out what she had tripped over. And of course, I am seriously hurting now. But I have hope. The followup is just under 2 weeks from now, and I am not taking that dang boot off until then. I should be better exponentially by then.

But here's the thing. I'm going stir crazy. I have found that one of the only ways that I can alleviate stress is through running. Sorry folks, the gym just doesn't cut it. And obviously I can't do zumba right now. So the stress builds... and trust me, right now I have a TON of stress (to be measured in metric F-tons).

I'm in another kind of race these days. I'm in the race to meet deadlines with my dissertation. If I can get my first draft completed by September, I could be defended by the end of the calendar year, which means I could have my ph.d. conferred as early as January or February. I need to meet this timeline so that I don't have to pay more tuition. And I really don't want to pay any more tuition. So there you have it. I'm brain fried and content overloaded. I'm working all day, and up half the night pondering my research questions and the shape that my final document will take. I'm overloaded by the hot political mess that is going on in Israel and Palestine as this tangentially affects the topic of my expertise. I'm needing to reduce stress in meaningful ways.

And of course that brings me back to the foot problem. So I thought about a mini-break to visit my good friend Sarah in Utah. Sarah and I have been working together to keep motivated through our ph.d. journeys, and we are both aiming for the same timeline to finish. Plus we are both peace workers, so we share a lot of the same emotional hardships. Did I mention that she is also a runner? And wouldn't you know it, she will be running her 3rd and qualifying race for half fanatics while I am visiting her. Coincidence? I think not.

I plead my fifth amendment rights as to the logistics of how this happened, but Sarah registered me for the race with her. I admit to no blame in the registration for this race, because registering for a race when I am not sure I will fully be healed wouldn't be very compliant of me, now would it? I think I'll be healed at that point, but even if, I can wear a brace to help alleviate the pressure. It will be fun. And hey, not only do I get to relieve stress by seeing one of my closest friends in a place that I've never been before, but I will also be able to share this amazing opportunity with her.

Porter's Half Marathon, here I come!

Hey Amy, how did that challenge go?

Last week, I excitedly wrote about a 1 week challenge where I allowed my friends on facebook to like my post and the total number of likes would determine my weekly mileage.

It was foolish, I know. But at the same time, I was excited to have a challenge to really push for, a reason to go out there and push my limits and really do something that would remind me of how far I've come and how strong I have gotten over the past 2 years.

I don't want to say that I wasn't entirely freaked out by the idea of logging 64 miles, but I made a commitment to go out there and give it the old college try. For me that included the senior year, the 4 years of undergraduate, the 2 years of graduate, and the almost 3 years (so far) of ph.d. work. That's a lot of college try. And that's what I wanted to put into this challenge.

But I came up short. Really, really ridiculously short.

I managed 6.77 miles on day 1 but then had to call it quits due to a severe electrical storm that came through.

On day 2, I broke it up and put in 6.5 miles in the morning. Then in the evening I did another 5.11 miles.

And that's where it all kind of fell apart. About 3 miles into the second workout on day 2, I started having the most horrid back spasms that I have had in about 10 years. These were leaving me barely able to catch my breath, and unable to stand up straight.

I took the next day off, and on day 4, I managed another 7.38 miles. I kept feeling like I was winded and out of breath. I blamed it on the heat and humidity, I soldiered on, but I couldn't keep going. The following day, the spasms were back in full force.

It was the 4th of July and I couldn't get out of bed. I spent the entire 3 day weekend either on the bed or the couch, alternating between barely able to catch my breath, staving off dizzy spells, and melting into a sobbing mess from tweaks here and there in my back.

And before I knew it, the 7 day challenge was done. I spent most of the week in pain and laid up. I managed to get in 25.76 miles, and I should feel proud of that. Unfortunately I'm still trying to convince myself that 25.76 miles in a week is nothing to turn my nose up at. Instead of being proud of what I accomplished, I keep thinking about the 38.24 miles that I didn't manage to log during the week.

It leaves me feeling like a failure.

What is wrong with me?

HTFU* and a one week challenge

What on earth have I gotten myself into?

A couple of my friends posted a challenge to facebook this weekend that basically their facebook friends would get to dictate what their running mileage would be for the week. In essence, they pledged to (in a 7 day time period) run the number of miles equivalent to the number of "likes" that they received to the post.

Thinking that I rarely have people like or comment on my posts, and thinking it would be fun, I bravely accepted the gauntlet that had been thrown down, and posted the following to my wall:

OK, my run buds Jennifer Hatcher and Edna Montoya threw down the gauntlet with their challenges. here's the thing, I need to get off my butt and get caught up to the mileage.

CHALLENGE

For every LIKE I receive to this post, I will do1 mile this week. LIKES on this post end at midnight tonight! (I had a cap on this but Jennifer told me to HTFU.) the week will start tomorrow.

I thought this could be fun. And while I was panicky at first thinking I needed to cap it at 40 miles at absolute max for the week, my friend reminded me that if I capped it at 40, then I might as well have just posted to my wall that I was going to run 40 miles for the week and not leave the option for anyone else to dictate my mileage.

I was scared, but she was right, and I needed to HTFU*. I removed the note about capping out at 40 miles, and bit my nails while watching the likes on my post rise and rise and rise. 

5 hours later, the polls closed, and I wound up with a total of 63 likes, equaling 63 miles to be completed in 7 days. Plus a dear friend informed me that hers would count for 2 likes. I figure, I'm already going to do 63 miles, why not add another?

64/7= 9.14 miles per day.

or I could break it into 2 times per day and get 4.57 miles per time out. and that seems really manageable... less than a year ago I managed 78.6 miles in 6 days, 2 months ago I managed 65.5 miles in 5 days... if I could do that, I can most certainly do this. 

But still, its a daunting task. Ok, enough jabbering, lets get this show on the road.  

This journey of 64 miles begins with one step.

*HTFU is one of my loving mantras, taught to me by my friend Jennifer on my 6 in 6 day fiasco, and it stands for Harden The F*** UP

26th Annual Memorial Day Classic Weston- May 25, 2014

Last year, I didn't get to participate in the Memorial Day Classic 5K in Weston. I was working doing promotions for USRS that day at two different events, and that could have been the reason, but I suspect that the real reason for skipping it last year was my aversion to the 5K distance.

I know it sounds crazy with all of the ridiculous mileage that I log all the time, but for me, the 5K just feels crazy long. In a half marathon, it usually takes me about a mile to get into the swing of things, but for a 5K, I feel like I spend the majority of my time trying to convince myself that I want to be out there running, then find that I am ok with running around the time that the distance is nearly over. Doesn't seem like much reward to cost benefit to me. So I avoid 5Ks. Even in training, while I might cut short to a 5K due to pain, or being overwhelmed by heat or humidity, I rarely say to myself that I am going to do a 5K when I leave the house. It is usually more like a plan to do 4 or 5 miles (at least).

But when I came back from the Riverboat Series, I felt like a part of myself was missing. I needed to take a little break to finally recover and let that pesky foot heal, but I also needed the mental break to remind myself why I ran in the first place. And with that break, I remembered that I run for the mental alignment that it provides, for the sense of self accomplishment that translates to heightened self-esteem, for the rush of endorphins and the increase of dopamine. I ran for me, and somewhere along the line (most likely with the intensification of that foot injury) I had forgotten what it was all about. I had somewhere along the line become too goal oriented, and too focused on being better than I had been previously, on more more more.

And so, after a brief hiatus from running, and a whole lot of introspection, I decided that it might be nice to register for a couple of 5K races to end out the season.I was ready to tackle it. I'd technically been on a break from running, but had kept up my training during the week with walking on the treadmill at the gym... and having done a couple of shorter road races on the weekends in between, so when the morning of the race rolled around, I felt prepared. I wasn't necessarily prepared for how brutally hot it was out there, or how little shade there was, but I was ready to run.

I was also able to rope husbeast into joining me for support. He is the one that really motivated me on this running journey, and while he did 3 half marathons throughout 2013, he's just not that into it anymore. I'd love him to run more, and I thought that maybe coming out there just to support me might spark some jealousy and get him motivated to start running again, but the verdict is still out on that one.

The race was fairly straightforward. It was really crowded, was disgustingly hot and there was very little shade, but the race support was awesome. No electrolyte drink, but I've noticed that while running, sports drinks make me sick to my stomach, so its not like that really bothered me. It might have been nice to have some at the finishline, but that's neither here nor there. I was left feeling really impressed with the organization of the event, and the crowd was super supportive as well. I always like a race like that.

I'm not going to say it wasnt a tough race. the no shade thing was a big turnoff, but I plodded along. and when I felt like I needed the extra support, I reached into my pocket and pulled out the coin that my friend Scott gave me as he was running to honor the fallen heroes. It was memorial day afterall, so why not take some strength from Scott's coin that is designed in memory of some brave men who gave their lives serving in the US Military? that seemed to bring me the extra boost of strength that I needed to fight the heat. And I soon found myself smiling.

Actually, after the first mile,

I found myself smiling a lot. I was really enjoying myself out there, despite the crazy heat index. I knew a lot of the other runners there too, so although I was struggling from the heat and humidity, emotionally I was also really well supported. When I got to about 2.5 miles, a group who I knew from other events and who had already finished came back for me and ran me for about a quarter of a mile until I told  them that people behind me needed them more. I came into the finishing chute and saw my husband and some of my friends cheering me on from the sidelines.

I don't know if I've said this before, but I can't emphasize this enough. It is SO important to get support from your friends at the finishline. I will be writing another post about this in the very near future, but it is worth mentioning here. I've run in a lot of races in my 2.5 years of running, and when my faster paced friends wait at the finishline for me and are there to cheer me on, it feels awesome. It feels like they respect me and my finish time, regardless of how slow it happens to be. But again, not the point of this post, that will come later.

anyway, I finished the race, drank a bottle of water, then headed back out onto the course to find one of my other friends and support her in a nice strong finish too.

Gun 48:04
Chip 47:55
Pace 15:26
Cat 58/58
OA 887

Believe it or not, I am ok with that time, and being last in my category. I've accepted my place at the back of the pack, and with the heat and humidity, I could have just as easily stayed at home in the air conditioning.

What's more, I was reminded of why I do this, and where the joy in running actually is. And if it takes a 5K race to be reminded of that joy, eventhough they are "ridiculously long" in this twisted brain of mine, I'll do another one any time you invite me.

Heroes in Recovery 6k- May 3, 2014

I was wiped after my last race series that brought me through 5 states in 5 days to do 5 half marathons. I wound up walking them, which though I insisted that I was ok with, I was still kind of kicking myself for.

The course at Tradewinds park

It took me a lot of hard work to be able to say that I could run a half marathon. It took a long time and a lot of hard work for me to get to a point where I considered myself a runner, but I over did it. And I was left paying a very high price. Being sidelined, particularly when there is such a negative stigma that follows around those who walk at races can do a number on the psyche. Being called "just a walker" really can take a toll on a person, but even worse, when so many people say it in a negative way, those of us who walk races find ourselves internalizing this sometimes, at least I know that I do. I do the mileage. I go out there for hours and hours on end, putting one foot in front of another, racking up a ridiculous about of mileage, but walking it leaves me feeling inferior. I'm sure that a lot of that is my own conditioning of feeling like I am not good enough, feeling like an imposter in the running community, and just having poor self-esteem. Regardless, that's not really the point of this post, and I am quickly digressing. So back to the topic at hand.

I was wiped after my last race series that had me walking for a grand total of 65.5 miles through the Mississippi delta.

I knew that what my brain and my body needed more than anything was a break. I'd been constantly on the go for so long, racking up miles upon miles of race mileage, and that's not even considering all those hours out there that I plugged away at training runs. I was exhausted. My body was hurting, my brain was hurting.  It was time for a real break, one where I focused on other activities... Like zumba. And the gym. But I found that I kept putting myself up on that treadmill to walk just a few miles to keep my mileage up. And slowly the pain started to subside. And I felt like my ankles and feet were getting stronger. and I was remembering why I did all of this in the first place. Because it certainly sucks when I am doing it, it was nice to feel good again after putting in a little mileage.

And so that's why, even though I had been on a kick to resist entering into any more races until the fall when I know my body has had a bit more time to recover, I found a couple smaller races to enter which would (hopefully) allow me to rebuild some confidence and keep my endurance up. I had wanted to do the Heroes in Recovery 6K last year, but I had something else scheduled for that weekend. So when I found this year, when I found out that it was coming to town again, I signed up at the very last minute. I had hoped Husbeast might want to join me and get some of his running mojo back, but alas, it didn't happen. Not only was it a shorter distance than I normally do, but it is a cause that is near and dear to my heart, promoting healing from drug and alcohol addiction and the reclamation of life. How can one not support something like that?

So bright and early on May 3, I drove up to Tradewinds park in Coconut Creek, well prepared for a nice leisurely, no stress, shorter race. I wasn't aiming for any specific goal time, I just wanted to be out there and support a good cause, and try my hand (ahem, my feet) at running again. Would my weak ankles and feet let me do it? I really like my interval timer on my garmin, but I really only wanted it for the interval beeping, not to keep myself on any specific pace or to force myself to go faster. I just wanted to go out there and do my thing.

And I did. The course was gorgeous, we passed the lakes and stables. Of course the smell of the stables made it a little difficult for me to breathe, but I was out there having a good time. And I was smiling. There were a lot of walkers out there too. And by walkers, I don't mean veterans to racers who just happen to be walking. Because this event benefited various rehabilitation centers, there were a LOT of people who were bussed in from local programs to participate. Many of whom, it was clear by the way that they were dressed and by their etiquette on the course, were out doing their first event like this. This made the first mile or so difficult because there were walls of people in denim shorts who were walking at no more than a 22 minute mile who I needed to dodge and weave around. But with a little time, the herd thinned out, and I found myself pacing and leapfrogging with a couple of women who were also really enjoying themselves.

Before I knew it, I was already hitting the 5K mark and just had a little more to go till the finish line. I was tired. The humidity was getting to me, the heat was oppressive, and the hot dusty breeze from the pastures and stables made it feel awful to try to get a full deep breath. But the finish line was in sight. I ran in, and was shocked to see that my garmin said that I had made a PR!

Unfortunately, all that meandering to get around groups early on in the event made my mileage go over, which slowed me down overall by 8 seconds per mile. Yikes. Still, it felt pretty dang good to go out there and enjoy running so much once again. The additional excitement from a near PR was just icing on the cake.

Gun 56:33.8
Chip 56:11.2
Pace 15:06/ mile
Time back 24:02.8 (Negative Splits!)
OA 230/397